Let's Talk About It

OMGoodness

2006-11-04T18:11:00.000-08:00

I was bored tonight and reading through a co-workers blog. She has several interesting link to other blogs and I came to a link that brought me to this blog. When I started reading, I thought it sounded familiar, then I realized that it was MINE!!! Except, with my exceptional memory, I forgot both the username and password... I thought all was lost. As I read through other blogs, I decided that I was determined to figure out how to get back on here.... TA DA, here I am! I very excited!!!! Now I can blog again, but I have to warn you, I not good at keeping up with things such as these. But I do promise to do my best. Sometimes I find writing theraputic, other times it seems that it takes forever to get to my point and I just don't have the energy. Either way... here I am again.

Ugh!

2005-11-13T11:29:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I feel like I'm trapped in the movie Groundhog's Day. The same day over and over and over and over and over...well, you get the picture. Every second of my free time has to be accounted for to my in-laws cause "there's always stuff that can be done at dad's house." I know that we are trying to sell the house and it needs to be cleaned out, but one night this last week my husband and I decided we wanted to stay home and play games with our son and relax. We got two phone calls from two different brothers wanting to know why we weren't at the house getting stuff done!!! Well forgive me for wanting a moments rest!!! And why is it that they feel we need to answer to them anyway?!?! So saturday morning, before we are even out of bed, the phone rings and his brother wants to know when are we going to be there? Oh for crying out loud, the sky is NOT going to fall on us all if we aren't there at the butt crack of dawn!!!!! So we dutifully get out of bed, take showers and head over. To which we are greeted with, "what took ya so long?" So now my father-in-law in officially in the retirement villa, but there is still so much that has to be gone through and done at the house he has lived in for the last 32 years... Anytime you put those brothers together, there's hot tempers and everyone has a different idea and it's the best!! No team work whatsoever...that was fun... My one brother-in-law and his wife in particular, aren't happy with my husband and I being married. ::::(side note, in case I haven't told you this part...here's the long short of another story...My husband and I are second cousins by adoption. His uncle adopted my mom when she was 6. There is no blood relation between us. And since my dad was in the military, I didn't really grow-up with much family. So while I was aware of my husband's existance, there wasn't ever a whole lot of time spent with he and his brothers...so my grandfather...if I choose to call him that... is his uncle. During my lifetime, we would hear stories of what was going on with other family members via my grandfather, and vise versa obviously. Well, when my husband and I began to date, I found out that my grandfather and been telling people untruths about me and life. Some things were out right lies... I was furious!!!! I encouraged my husband to ask my any questions he had about my past and to feel free to ask any other family that might know the truth also, I didn't want him to have any doubts about my honesty!!!) So, enlight of all of this, there is a brother who has been given false information and isn't happy with our union. Unfortunatly, he and his wife have passed their distaste for me onto their two teenage children. And while I thought things were going so well yesterday with my one sister-in-law, at the end of the day my husband related a story to me that broke my heart. At one point during the day, my husband (let's call him Pete) was talking to his 14 year old niece (Jana) and she made a comment about, "her aunts and Sara (me)." To which Pete replied, "Sara is your aunt too!" She said, "No she's NOT she's my cousin!" I wanted to cry!!! I don't understand...am I never going to be able to redeem myself to these people??? Then I got angry, because I have never been in her life...EVER She didn't know who I was until I started to date her uncle...I've never been a cousin to her, and in the grand scheme of things, I'd be a third or fourth cousin anyway.......why do people pass bad attitudes onto their children??? Now sitting here, it makes me sad again... and we have to go back there again today................................................ I have to give up watching the colts play, to be in the company of people who teach their children to hate me...

Movie

2005-11-05T09:21:00.000-08:00

So last night after we finished getting some things done at his dad's house, we rented some movies. I LOVE to watch movies!!! I watched The Wedding Date and Diary of a Mad Black Woman, both turned out to be very good movies. Of course my husband fell asleep after about 20 min. into the first...anytime he sits, he falls alseep...mmmmm... anyway So what I was wondering is... Why do the characters in the movies become to real to me. I become so involved in what is going on that if it doesn't go the way I want it to or think it should, I get outraged! LOL I feel the same way about books. It's why I love to read! I become absorbed in characters and it's like living their lives, strange. I do admit to being strange, happily! Why be normal... but I was thinking of starting to write my own book! I have seriously start it already in my head. It would a romance of course. I love Nora Roberts and Sandra Brown... maybe I could spin some of my ideas on here and see what happens. Anyway, time to get back to the family! More cleaning to be done at my father-in-laws house... and have to decide if we are going to see Chicken Little tonight or go to a hockey game! Adios

??Why??

2005-11-04T10:00:00.000-08:00

I have never really been someone who asks God why. I figure that there is a reason for everything and that if i don't understand why now, I will when God is ready to reveal it to me. HOWEVER, I truely don't understand why God created In-laws!!!!!!!! I see no purpose except to be a pain in the %#@. First off my in-laws don't like me anyway...forget the fact that they haven't taken the time to get to know who I am or what I'm about. I've known them for a long time, but have you ever known someone, but not really know who they are....? It doesn't matter what we do, I'm always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

We are in the process of moving his dad into a retirement facility, and getting my husband and his siblings to agree on anything without verbally abusing one another is insane. We when come over to get something done at his dad's house, it's always something; either we are there later than they wanted us there, or we didn't stay long enough, or didn't accomplish all that they wanted us to. Last night we went over and they didn't have the decency to wait for us to leave before they started talking about us. Just went into the other room and shut the door!!!! Today we have to give up our entire day because they want us there...so we'll be trapped with them all evening. I wanted to stay home and get our new place all put together, but his brother said we'll have all the time in the world to do our apartment another day and the house has to be done now! Never mind the fact that I can't get to my closet door to get any clothes or shoes out. My mom says the we shouldn't shy away from being around them. That will only make them feel like they've won! I say, I don't have to be the presence of people who teach their children that it's okay to not like and talk bad about family. So fine, the won! If that's the kind of game they want to win, so be it. I refuse to play!! Oh well, I'm rambling and don't feel like this is making much sense...

New at this...

2005-11-01T10:12:00.000-08:00

Well, I am completely new at this whole blog thing. I suppose I should do some looking around to see what others post and what this thing is all about. But as usual, I'm impatient and just wanted to get started! hehe... So now i'm off to explore...

Don't know what to do

2005-11-01T07:58:00.000-08:00

So...I got married recently!! (yeah!) We have been going to his church together since we started dating. At the time, I didn't have a home church. He has been going to his all of his life (minus those rebellous years!) and he helps run the AV on Sundays. Here's my problem...I don't feel God there. I know he is, because he's always with me, ALWAYS! But the church feels so lifeless. They don't seem excited about God, and my husband often isn't sure of God's presence with him at all times. I want to try another church, more like the ones I grew up in (clapping, singing, dancing, lifting hands). Is it fair? I do try, but on more than one occasion I have majorly disagreed with his pastors sermon and we've talked about it afterwards. He is agreeable to trying a new church, but I don't think his heart is in and I feel badly. I really feel that God will use my husbands talents no matter where we attend! Am I being fair to ask for this change?